Lifestyle

Counselling gives couples good start

Don't be blinded by love – there are many issues you should consider discussing before you get married.
Don't be blinded by love – there are many issues you should consider discussing before you get married. Contributed

FRANK Sinatra may have sung that love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage but, according to Relationships Australia, making sure your horse and cart are compatible in the first instance is often the answer to ensuring a lengthy trot.

Relationships Australia senior clinical leader Diana Sayer said regardless of whether couples were getting married for the first or third time or even just moving in together, ironing out potential disagreements through pre-marriage counselling could save a lot of hurdles down the track.

"The main thing we find is it opens up the communication," she said.

"Sometimes couples go into the next stage of the relationship where they have this rose-coloured view of the relationship."

Ms Sayer said there were a vast number of factors to consider in any relationship before taking things to the next level.

She said there were often differences between couples that might not even come to light until both partners were under the one roof.

"It's really about identifying what those differences are and talking through them," she said.

"We find some of the main reasons for couples separating are values and beliefs.

"Counselling puts those things on the table in the beginning."

Ms Sayer said the point of identifying differences between couples in pre-marriage counselling was to learn to work around potential issues, rather than one person in the relationship feeling the need to change for the other.

"Things that can come between couples are their ideas on parenting and how they see themselves with children," she said.

"People's attitudes towards sex is also something that can cause problems in the future of a relationship."

Ms Sayer said the Relationships Australia FOCCUS pre-marriage program had been counselling couples for about 30 years.

"It's not to say couples won't have problems later on, but it's very beneficial in the longer term," she said.

 

Things to talk about

  • Desire for children, or lack of
  • Career plans
  • Home location
  • Finance
  • Attitude to sex
  • Cultural or religious differences
  • Time spent with friends and family
  • Expectations for closed or open relationships
  • Attitudes to drug and/or alcohol use
  • Personal values

 

>> Read more lifestyle stories

Topics:  counselling lifestyle love marriage relationships australia



Brisbane's arts and culture events centre stage

A CITY drenched in culture, Brisbane is again flaunting an arts and culture events calendar fit for a queen.

Homewares stores to fulfil your Instagram dreams

No Caption

You too can become an Insta-star with these fab stores.

Date nights under $50

Nothing is more romantic than a picnic with a cracking view.

NOT every date has to cost you a bomb.

Top 10 Brisbane experiences to cross off your bucket list

Do yourself a favour and get amongst the food truck scene. Eat Street is a great place to start.

A GOOD bucket list doesn’t have to span continents or cost millions.

Six mega sporting events you need to be at this year

Don't miss all the action trackside this season.

IF THERE is one thing Brisbane does damn well, it’s play host.

Six reasons to get to Brisbane this Autumn

The Brisbane Powerhouse has free comedy on Friday nights.

AUTUMN has to be up there with one of the best seasons of the year.

The best things to do in Brisbane are FREE. Yes, FREE

Mt Coot-tha is a seriously gorgeous way to start your day.

HEADING to the big smoke doesn’t have to come with a big price tag.

McCulkin tragedy: A summer evening’s drive becomes murder

Barbara McCulkin and her daughters Vicki and Leanne disappeared from Highgate Hill in January of 1974. Vincent O'Dempsey, from Warwick, has been found guilty of their murders.

The girls and their mum had no reason to fear O’Dempsey.

Sled dogs race near Stanthorpe

ON YOUR MARKS: Sled Dog Racing Queensland is kicking off its racing season in the Passchendaele State Forest.

Club competes at Passchendaele State Forest

Scrapped plans delight Allora

The proposal to change the area around Grainx from a residential to an industrial zoning has been knocked back by Southern Downs Regional Council.

Residents happy to see rezoning around Grainx nixed

Local Partners

Baywatch: Lifeguards with model looks return for 'filthy fun'

TWO chiselled men emerge from the surf. One looks like a god. The other, well, he's gasping for air and doesn't realise there's a jellyfish on his chest.

Model Bella Hadid's see-through dress shocks in Cannes

US model Bella Hadid attends the Cinema Against AIDS amfAR gala 2017 held at the Hotel du Cap, Eden Roc in Cap d'Antibes, France, 25 May 2017.

It’s like she’s become addicted to shock value.

No room for morbid fans

Chris Cornell.

Fans want to stay in the hotel room where Chris Cornell died

Star Wars' 1977 Stormtrooper head banger confesses

A Stormtrooper is responsible for the biggest blunder in a Star Wars movie. Picture: Supplied

Man in most famous blooper in Star Wars history breaks silence

Lyn's knock-out show gets her to next round on The Voice

ONWARDS AND UPWARDS: Lyn Bowtell is through to the battle rounds on The Voice.

'It was bitter sweet to win like that'

Is this the talent you get when you limit electronics?

Cassidy Kilburn in the Get the Beat International Dance Competition.

Cassidy, 11, preparing for national dance championships

Report reveals progress on $319m airport upgrade

Aerials of the Sunshine Coast.Jetstar plane in front of the Susnhine Coast terminal, Sunshine Coast Airport.

Over two dozen government approvals needed for airport expansion

Lost dough leaves sour taste after company collapse

Kathleen and John Mahoney from Sugar and Spice Bakery were stung after the collapse of Cantro Pty Ltd and are still owed money.

Supermarket operator collapse leaves sour taste for bakery

Open for inspection homes May 25-31

Check out this weekend's homes open for inspection

How Toowoomba house prices compare in Australia

For sale sign in front of home.

Here's what $700,000 will buy you in Toowoomba, Brisbane and Sydney

One of Maryborough's most historic homes is still for sale

FULL OF HISTORY: Trisha Moulds is owner of the historic Tinana state known as Rosehill. The beautiful home is currently for sale.

It has been the scene of both joy and tragedies over the years.

Ready to SELL your property?

Post Your Ad Here!